At around 10:00pm, Paw passed away (temporarily). He actually “passed out” for approximately ten to fifteen fifteen to twenty seconds. Maw panicked and turned beet red in the face while trying to revive him in her arms. I let a blood curdling scream: “Dad!”. Maw said: “Call 9/11!” Paw said: “I’m okay.”
He was okay after the doctor at the emergency discharged him around 1:30am. Apparently, the increased dosage to one of his medicine prevents his heart from pumping blood to Paw’s brain while another medicine lowered his blood pressure.
I surmised that he was pissed off that we said more novenas and litanies than the normal three chaplets done in thirty minutes that evening; was still grieving internally for his recently deceased Maw; and got shocked from this afternoon’s news of his deceased uncle.
I also sensed that his physiological response to EXTREME psychological and emotional stress, like moi, is the decreased blood supply to the brain and the resulting cold and clammy feeling. Mine would be blue lips. His was the color of death – pallor of ash.
He temporarily died while sitting on his chair, which is usually positioned facing the miniature alter upstairs in Maw’s bedroom. I noticed he stamped his left foot out of FRUSTRATION, which was rare. His speech pattern was off and he couldn’t follow the prayers or respond accordingly.
Then I noticed that he started to turn left very slowly as if to look at Maw. His eyes were open and staring blankly to a slightly upper left hand corner. His body was stiff and unresponsive. His tummy didn’t move up and down to the rhythmic motion of breathing. He was really dead. His upper body slid slightly off the chair and onto Maw’s bed to his left as I saw his unblinking eyes in my seven o’clock direction from him.
I was standing at that time and didn’t flick or react until Maw said screamed for me to call 9/11. I didn’t feel ready to grieve at the time for I was on the phone with the response team and trying to answer the questions clearly and coherently. Right there, death doesn’t bother me. Right there, dying doesn’t frighten me. Right there, I was prepared to fight back the tears and didn’t care for my feelings.
I had to “be brave” as the boy told me while conversing at the waiting room. The twosome came after I called the boy’s cellphone, which he didn’t pick up because his battery needed charging and then hers, which she thankfully answered! But she mistakenly used the wrong sets of word to relay the message to the boy: “He passed away.” “He passed out” would have prevented the boy from feeling palpitation in his heart. He was pissed to have heard the incorrect words.
So it’s around 3:18am, Maw is sleeping while Paw is logging his entry for yesterday. Maw took her Valium and Paw will resume his old medication at 25mg a day. I (on the other hand) have had enough with those Masons, Satans, Wiccans and their bizarre rituals of bloody sacrifices. “All Hallows Day” may have taken his Uncle Julian this year and his grandmother “Taling” many years ago but last night was not the night to take Paw.
You will not pass this time.
He has my prayers… ♥