Monthly Archives: October 2010

Focus Feelings

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“When in doubt, you can choose to fight, flee or freeze.” ~the Flynn.

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What is Cognitive dissonance?

Cognitive dissonance is an uncomfortable feeling caused by holding conflicting ideas simultaneously.

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How can I resolve these feelings?

Below are three choices that you, my dear reader, could make right now:

1. Fight — I want to fight back against tyranny and oppression because forces outside myself continue to lie and deceive. I feel angry enough to take up arms against those who are angry, hateful and fearful of others. We are supposed to hate our worst enemies.

2. Flee — I do not want to hurt anybody or myself because I am a compliant citizen with a good heart and compassionate soul. I feel ashamed to think of taking revenge against those who are provocateurs, shills and disinfo agents. We are supposed to love our worst enemies.

3. Freeze — I do not want to fight back or run away because I cannot make up my mind. I will stay put in the hopes that the conflicting feelings will go away. Maybe if I play dead and disappear into the background, no on will notice me. We are supposed remain neutral.

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Remember: Take aim, focus and decide… Your fate is in your hands.

20101028-Turning Cloudy

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Okay! What happened to my sunshine, clear blue skies, clouds and sylphs? Bring them back! For the past few hours, the foggy clouds came rolling in! Was it something I can’t afford to do this time? Wow! Is it that bad? Damn!

You can tell those other set of reptoids to burn in hell. They continue to fool me and others. I don’t know what else to think. Do you expect me to believe your kinds are capable of doing good? All I see and hear are lies!

How am I supposed to take the next course of action with uncertainties lurking in the near future? I guess I’m just supposed to kneel down on my knees and pray really hard. Is that it? It’s not supposed to happen this time? Wow!

Addressing Moi

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“Manang, Flynn!”

~Mike

“Senior, Mike!”

~Moi

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I’m like, WTF? Isn’t that supposed to be an impolite way of addressing someone who is NOT an older sister and unmarried? I’m five years younger than he is and far from being married. But this is the polite way of addressing a Filipina for the Ilocano & Cebuano. Since I understand Tagalog, Mike should have addressed moi as Ate, not as in the past tense for eating food, but pronounced as “Ahh’ – te”.

Of course, I’m clueless and get thrown off easily by surprises. I had to explain that to him plus the fact that I’m “deaf”. So we walked off from the water fountain after he got his snacks of chips and the blue water bottle and after I finished dispensing my warm water between HOT and COLD.

Job Needs

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OMG! So at around 2:44pm, Hoan comes to my desk and inquires if I got his email to respond, which I didn’t because he’s getting annoying. But what surprised me is his accusatory tone that the girl is learning more than she’s willing to share with us and making us look bad so that the Viet could sign her up as full-time. I told him I’m not worried because the place monitors our activities (with the in-house auditors here daily) and because of our past working backgrounds in A/R.

The Viet knows I’m loud and fight back like Tess but with humor so as not to offend. But I’m not going to fight to keep this job. She needs it more than me because of her bum brother and his daughter living with her and her boyfriend. Then again, I’ve got nowhere to go and would like to commit myself to another employer willing to pay me a few ducats for my hard work and knowledge.

For example, I know Excel macros, programming basic CSS and some HTML, A/R and accounting (like Alan B. up front near the executive area), Remedy/HelpDesk tickets, basic Desktop support and well, internal/external auditing support. So if you people want to dick with a pissed off “professional” with a mean streak, go right ahead. I don’t give a damn.

Honestly, I want control of the process and own it too. It’s just scheduling and pegging new orders for crying out loud!