Monthly Archives: March 2011

20110330-Chocolate Treats

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While closing my eyes due to the lack of sufficient sleep of several bowel movements last night and taking a light snooze at my desk, little Theresa came by my desk for the second time. This time she brough me more chocolate: “Do you want some chocolate? It’s yummy!” she asked of me as she placed five small pieces on my desk.

Two Nestle Crunch wrapped in foil of electric blue with pink butterflies and three wrapped in light, coffee-colored foil with purple butterflies; one Hershey’s Special Dark Mildly Sweet Chocolate with Crisp Rice and one Hershey’s Special Dark Mildly Sweet Chocolate with Peanuts.

It’s no wonder that my teeth would easily decay from these sweets. “I’m so excited! And I can’t just hide it!” To leave this place is a relief and tomorrow we will go out to lunch as per her suggestion two hours ago. As for tall Alan, we was kind enough to visit my desk too around 4:00pm.

20110330-More Spooks

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I’m glad that I no longer have to work with that temp guy. He used the list of people from my email (that I sent at 11:11am) to send his farewell at 11:22am! I hate him! To my headhunter: Keep him away! I don’t ever want to work with people like him or his nationality. There is something creepy about the guy, just like the “Tai Chi Master” who was showing off, err, I meant, “exercising” outside to the back lobby area. We were walking from the parking lot after attending lunch from 12:00pm to 1:00pm.

20110330-Healthy Heys

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Last night, I’ve suffered a bout of constipation, partly because I’ve drank my Edible Earth without sufficient water. I haven’t brought my usual three water bottles of 16.9 fluid ounces (or 1.05 pint or 500 milliliter). I was so stuck I could feel the big one waiting to come out, but it couldn’t.

So I took 4 tablespoons of MOM (or Milk of Magnesia) and one orange-colored pill of Ducolax, which was a mistake because I would wake up three times each hour! My butt hole was feeling inflammed but not hemohroidal yet. The HOT water from my pitcher with a SPOUT helped wash the tender area.

Reading Passages

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So two days ago, I had an early morning bowel movement. And usually, I’d like to keep myself company with some sort of reading material. That time was an old book: “The Children’s Living Bible”. I recalled asking Maw to buy that book for me. It was displayed near a check out stand long ago.

My fingers riffed through the pages; my thumb opened up to a Biblical passage and my eyes read:

Ephesians 2 (Common English Bible)

8 You are saved by God’s grace because of your faith.[a] This salvation is God’s gift. It’s not something you possessed. 9 It’s not something you did that you can be proud of. 10 Instead, we are God’s accomplishment, created in Christ Jesus to do good things. God planned for these good things to be the way that we live our lives.

—

I got what I asked for. Yesterday, I had asked God: “Why am I still working at this “temp job from hell? Surely, there is someone who is in desparate need of a job than me!” And late last evening, the boss broke the news to the temp guy and me: We will be unemployed on April Fool’s Day. That shock saddened me but I was free! Free at last! Praise the Lord!

God knows that I’m not a good fit for the job. It was too boring and unchallenging. And the location of my cubicle was so disruptive with noises coming from the lock clutch when employees and contractors alike swipe their badge to gain entry to the second level and from the noisy people who walk by my desk.

So that’s good timing for me at least because it’s a good thing as always and something good but not necessarily better will happen. Only “God” knows and my fellow blog readers, of course. So I’ll stop cursing the “back door” users once they pay back my kindness in CASH, of course. It’s only fair if they and their descendants don’t want to suffer eternal damnation!

20110327-Damn Digleberries

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How do you get rid of dingleberries? Well awhile ago, I found out! By shaving the hairiness of my butt hole area, I actually liberated a strange matted item that I never knew existed! It was full of hair and all clumped together, say, the size of a quarter-sized dollar coin.

Don’t get me wrong! I am clean but because my butt hole is really hairy, that particular dung got trapped and thus formed without my knowledge! Soap and water apparently didn’t clean it right off! And there it stuck. Until one day I shaved the area completely! That’s right! I was smooth, too!

On the flip side, those whose sole purpose is to suck the lifeforce of good-hearted people need to be removed. And that’s what I’m going to do starting April Fool’s Day — the day to stop giving my hard-earned money away to those who cannot seem to let go of their old ways of living — by the kindness of others.